Publicity stunt alert!

America’s Next Top Out-Of-Work Model was crowned last night, and in the midst of a TV season plagued by no one giving a crap, Tyra and her insane gang of whoozywhatsits chose Whitney, the, uh, fat one?

Not to be “that girl” but seriously - how is she a plus-sized model?? Just because she doesn’t look like she’s made out of made of flesh colored paperclips? Give me a break. If she would just stand up straight, all she would be is a model with a really wide jaw.

Share This

Posted by Starked L.A. Staff | No Comments »

Weezer’s new song The Greatest Man That Ever Lived is crazy! In a good way… I think… At least four of my personalities really liked it, two others say it sucked, and then the other five thought it was just okay (I’m Cybil in this scenario by the way…)

Well, you’ll see what I mean.

Share This

Posted by Starked L.A. Staff | No Comments »

I really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really hope Britney Spears just ate too much Mexican food, and is not, in fact, pregnant with her third child:

Who would the father even be? Adnan? K-Fed?? Jesus???

B-Spee also rear-ended a car again earlier today, this time one that was stopped in front of her at a red light, just in case we’re back to that whole tracking-and-mocking-Britney’s-every-move thing.

Poor Jaime-Lynn. Big sissy just can’t let that girl keep the spotlight.

Share This

Posted by Starked L.A. Staff | No Comments »

If there’s one thing I hate, it’s when I’m all coked out and then just when I need ‘em, I can’t find my knee pads! Well thank goodness for Lindsay Lohan, because she has finally invented pants with the knee pads built right in!

Lilo got some good head…shots and picked a couple of models to wear her new line of completely ridiculous leggings on Saturday, and although the girls can say that they’ve gotten some good exposure from this, they did wear the tights/pants for free, thus they are total suckas.

And yes, one pair of Lohan’s digs looks like it has built in knee-pads, which makes them a good, less-permanent alternative to the Tramp Stamp - for all those times when you want to say “I’m really easy” but you just don’t want to open your mouth… yet.

Image used with permission of www.newscom.com 

Share This

Posted by Starked L.A. Staff | No Comments »

1. I’ve learned that Patrick Duffy must hate his life.

  Patrick Duffy Hates You on FunnyOrDie.com

2. I’ve learned that Game Show Network really likes asking questions about types of apples. I can’t find any proof of this to show you, but trust me. Apples are delicious.

AND BEST OF ALL…

3. I’ve learned that there is a Beard Team USA!! Which lead me to find THIS website for the International World Beard & Mustache Championship! From which I’ve learned that Germans take their beard and mustache growing very, very seriously.

Share This

Posted by Starked L.A. Staff | No Comments »

What’s the best way to explain Britney Spears’ latest turn at ruining How I Met Your Mother?

You know how it’s really sad when there’s, like, a tired old circus bear that’s pulled out of its cage and paraded around in front of the crowd and then it has to do its little tricks and everything but you can tell it’s all heartless and blah and it’s just doing it ’cause otherwise no one will feed it? Yeah, it’s kinda like that.

Share This

Posted by Starked L.A. Staff | No Comments »

Dennis Farina, a.k.a. that guy from “Law & Order,” was arrested today at LAX (the airport here in Los Angeles, not the nightclub out in Las Vegas - I hate that damn nightclub!) Why was he arrested, you ask? Because he tried to get on on airplane with a loaded .22 caliber semi-automatic pistol! And I thought he was just happy to see me (wocka, wocka…)

According to E! Online:

“He was transported to a police station in Van Nuys and is being held on $35,000 bail.Police say Farina, 64, was ‘very apologetic and cooperative’ and told them he had simply forgotten about the weapon.”

Here’s a question: How do you forget you have a gun in your suitcase when you go to the airport?? Don’t you always feel like you’re gonna get caught with a gun in your suitcase when you go to the airport?? Maybe that’s just me…

Image used with permission of www.newscom.com

Share This

Posted by Starked L.A. Staff | No Comments »

Do little kids ever make you feel really inferior with their hardcore Guitar Hero skills, while you barely just figured out how to put a song on your MySpace page?

Well, now you can feel really inferior about your REAL guitar skills, because 8 year-old (EIGHT year-old!) Yuto Miyazowa just rocked your face off (and seriously, you just click “Add”):

 
Yuto Miyazawa - 8-Year Old Japanese Guitar Phenom! from Metal Edge TV on Vimeo.

Share This

Posted by Starked L.A. Staff | No Comments »

Mariah Carey AND Fergie have both bailed out of their performances at the Divas in Dubai concert - and only a week before the show!

Here’s the official press release from showbizme.com:

Divas in Dubai Update

Dubai, May 8, 2008 – Midas Promotions along with Blue Giraffe Entertainment and On Golden Pond Pictures regret to announce the “Divas in Dubai” concert event is being rescheduled to a later date in the Fall 2008.

“Mariah and Fergie are disappointed that they won’t be able to perform,” commented a Producer for the first time ever, back to back event. “They had scheduled this one special event in their calendars and were looking forward to performing for the Dubai fans.”

Mel Tyler, of Midas Promotions, stated that “the extremely compressed time frame along with unforeseen logistical complications compelled us to move the event later in the year to ensure a show commensurate with the level of success of these world class Artists and the people of Dubai.”

For customers who have already purchased, the ticket value will be refunded to your credit card within 10-21 working days.

Regards

The Showbiz Team

Okay, I wouldn’t want to go to Dubai either, but a week before the concert?? This better not get taken out on me and my Honda…

Share This

Posted by Starked L.A. Staff | No Comments »

How far can Mischa Barton fall this week??

First, she was exposed as having the ass of a ninety year old, and now she appears to be covering said ass with the reject wardrobe from Shrek on Ice!

Somebody’s stylist needs to get fiiiired!

Image used with permission of www.SplashNewsOnline.com

Share This

Posted by Starked L.A. Staff | No Comments »